Try to incorporate these habits to become a more confident woman in order to reach your full potential
With International Women’s Day right around the corner (March 8), I thought it would be good to hit on a very important topic: Women’s confidence.
While society has made many great strides forward in gender equality, there are still some biases. In the United States, women hold more degrees than men but we still only make 80 cents for every dollar a man makes!
This is just not right!
Even though it is easier to blame this on senior male leaders and how the world works, we have to take some responsibility here. Not all of it but some. A little tough love.
Because the truth is that women are typically harder on themselves than men. Our inner critic is a little louder and it holds us back.
You may have heard of this popular statistic from a Hewlett Packard internal report that women only apply for jobs when they meet 100% of the qualifications, while men apply when they meet 60% of the qualifications.
In other words, we aren’t even putting our names in the running for those big jobs and if we do, we don’t feel like we’re qualified.
But why are we harder on ourselves? That’s where you can point your finger back at society. Women are conditioned to feel this way. It’s ingrained in us from a young age.
We’re not only held to higher standards but we are also judged more harshly than men. Our success is often attributed to luck or help from others instead of our own abilities.
And unfortunately, this lack of confidence isn’t just limited to women in the workforce. It spans all aspects of our lives, including our personal relationships and parenting.
So what can we do about it?
There is no single answer to this question as the confidence gap between men and women is a complex issue. However, I think every step we take on working on our personal development is a step closer to closing this gap.
That’s why I’m going to give you 13 habits that I’ve seen in confident women that I look up to. Everyone can work on their self-confidence and as more women feel more confident in their abilities, the closer we will get to closing this gap.
Pauline Clance and Suzanne Imes called this ‘imposter syndrome’ which is a term that is thrown around A LOT nowadays.
But what does it really mean? It’s a phenomenon that is well documented and occurs when women doubt their accomplishments and feel like they are frauds, despite evidence to the contrary.
Symptoms of Imposter Syndrome can include self-doubt, inability to take compliments, perfectionism, and believing that you aren’t as good as others think you are.
And if you make a mistake, others are going to think you’re a fraud and you’ll lose everything you’ve worked for.
Young women have to start owning their power. As women get older, the confidence gap closes but we need to close that gap sooner! A women’s confidence needs to be built up as early as possible.
And that starts with being more confident in ourselves.
Now some men experience imposter syndrome as well but it is way more prevalent in women. Men learn at a young age that they are capable of anything they put their minds to.
I can see it in my brothers, my fiance, and honestly, any male in my life. They just don’t seem to care what other people think unlike a lot of the women I know.
And this has got to change. We have to work on closing this confidence gap.
The Confidence Gap
In a very broad sense, this is about the lack of confidence women have compared to men. Some gender differences include women stressing about their looks, about being well-liked, not drawing too much attention to ourselves, and feeling like we’re not smart enough or competent enough …
the list goes on and on.
Women put so much pressure on themselves! We set the bar SO high.
So high that it is impossible to reach.
I’m definitely guilty of this too. I’m a perfectionist. And it’s a total waste of time.
The good news is that we can close this gap. We can start working on our self-confidence and becoming more resilient.
But it’s not going to be easy. It’s going to require some work and a lot of effort.
What is Self Confidence?
Before we get into the 13 habits of women with confidence, let’s first define what self-confidence actually is.
Self-confidence is believing in ourselves, our abilities, and our worth. It is feeling good about ourselves, no matter what life throws our way.
It’s being comfortable in our own skin and not letting others bring us down.
Self-confidence is not arrogance or cockiness. It’s simply having a positive view of ourselves, even when we make mistakes.
How to Build Self Confidence
Now that we understand what self-confidence is, let’s talk about how we can build it up. Which I know, is way easier said than done.
Self confidence isn’t something that happens overnight. It takes a long time and a lot of self-reflection. That’s why I like journaling and affirmations because it’s an actionable way to change your mindset that you can do every day.
We didn’t develop low self-esteem overnight and we won’t be in a good place for self-confidence overnight as well. So give yourself grace during this process.
The best way to build self confidence is to start incorporating the below habits into your daily routine. You may feel like an imposter at first but fake it until you make it. Eventually, you’ll feel more confident.
13 Habits of a confident woman
All successful women radiate confidence! As they should! It took hard work and dedication to get them where there are. They are role models for the rest of us! So if you need a confidence boost, let’s dive into these habits.
1. Accept that you aren’t perfect
A lot of women are perfectionists and they hate making mistakes. I’m definitely a recovering perfectionist. We’re so scared of being judged, being looked down upon, and making a mistake, no matter how big or small.
Newsflash: we will be judged and looked down upon no matter what we do. Perfectionism is subjective after all. What you think is perfect, might not be perfect for someone else.
And if you make a mistake? Try to remind yourself that it is okay! It’s part of being human, welcome to the club!
After all, you have to fail in order to learn. F.A.I.L is actually an acronym for First Attempt In Learning if you didn’t know :). You are never going to get good at something if you don’t try. Don’t let the fear of failure get you from having new life experiences. Instead, take a new approach to it and tell yourself that it’s your first attempt at learning something new.
It’s time to stop being so hard on yourself and accept that you are not perfect. You are going to make mistakes and that’s okay. In fact, it’s downright human! Embrace your vulnerability and imperfections.
2. Be Uniquely YOU
No one is just like you and that’s a powerful thing. We all have our own strengths and weaknesses so use yours to your advantage!
Stop trying to be someone you’re not. You are unique for a reason so embrace it! Don’t try to imitate someone else or compare yourself to them. You are your own person and that’s something special.
If you want to know the secret to a fulfilling and happy life, being unconditionally you is it!
If that sounds impossible, the first thing you need to do is to stop comparing yourself to other women on social media. Confident people stay in their own lane! Because no one else brings everything that you do to the table.
Besides, social media is filtered. People only show the part of themselves they’re proud of. Don’t forget about that when you wanna compare your crappy day to what’s out there online.
3. Stop thinking about what you should do
Instead, start thinking about what you want to do.
Too often we women are focused on what we should do. How we should act. We put other people’s opinions before our own and it is the right time to stop that.
Start thinking about what you want to do in life. What makes you happy? What are your passions? And go for it! Don’t let anyone stop you from achieving your personal goals and dreams.
Even if it’s deciding what to have for dinner or how you’re going to spend your day. Stop looking to others and start looking within to find out what you really want.
4. Challenge your inner critic
Let’s face it, we are hard on ourselves. We have an inner critic that is always pointing out our flaws and telling us we’re not good enough.
It’s time to start challenging that voice! Start making decisions based on your gut instincts instead of that negative self-talk that is going on inside your head.
And most importantly, don’t be so hard on yourself. Accept that you are human and you are going to make mistakes. No one cares as much as you think they do. Trust me.
Working on challenging your inner critic through positive affirmations, shadow work, or journaling can be a really powerful tool and an actionable way to increase your love for yourself.
If you need some help getting started, you know I got you
If you can change your mindset to be more positive and less judgemental, it is amazing what you can accomplish.
5. Embrace that women and men are different
Oftentimes, gender differences are something that is perceived negatively. While equality is super important and something that should happen for everyone, acknowledging our differences is what makes human beings so special.
You have something different to bring to the table! Women think differently than men so a woman can bring a perspective a man wouldn’t be able to. Use the gender stereotypes to your advantage for once.
It’s time to start embracing these differences and stop trying to be like a man. We, women, have something special to offer and it’s time we started sharing our voices!
6. Don’t wait for the perfect opportunity, go for it!
It’s time to get out of your comfort zone and start doing the small things that scare you. After you see all the positive things that come into your life, you will feel more confident to take on bigger risks and do bigger things.
Don’t wait for someone else to do it for you, go out and do it yourself! Because no one is going to do it for you. You are in charge of your own destiny and journey through life experiences. Nothing will ever change if you stay in your comfort zone.
Because leaving your comfort zone is where you truly grow and the more we grow, the more confident we become in our abilities and truly figure out our full potential.
So start small by taking baby steps. If you want to start a business, start by doing some research or writing a business plan.
If you want to travel, save up some money and start planning your trip.
Don’t put things off because you’re scared, just do it! And remember that it’s okay to be scared, that’s normal.
7. Create a better environment for yourself by being around positive women and building other women up!
Surround yourself with ambitious women who will lift you up. We are a product of our environment after all so if you surround yourself with negative Nancys, then you’re going to have a pretty negative mindset.
While we all have those negative thoughts and doubts at times, it’s important to have women in our lives that will help us rise above that.
Women who are examples for us. She inspires us to be better and gives us an example of what life could be like if we worked our butt off as she did.
Building other women up is one of the most powerful things we can do! We need to start being a more supportive and positive community as women. There is no point in trying to bring each other down. It feels so much better to celebrate wins with other women and support each other in living our best lives.
There is strength in numbers so let’s start working together to close the confidence gap!
8. Set Clear Goals
When you know what you want, it’s easier to go for it. Simple as that.
Start by setting some goals for yourself- both short-term and long-term. Make sure they are realistic and achievable and that you are putting your best foot forward.
You know, good old SMART goals.
Think about what steps you need to take to achieve them and then start taking them! Crossing items off of your goal list will give you a sense of accomplishment and help boost your confidence level. If you set clear goals, it is going to be easier to reach them because you know what you need to do!
And that’s half the battle. Then you need the confidence to go for the things you want and put in the hard work. But don’t worry, I believe in you!
9. Create Boundaries
One thing that holds women back is their inability to say no. We often feel like we need to do everything and please everyone. You know, those good old people-pleasing tendencies.
People pleasing comes from a place of low self-esteem and low confidence. That if you say no, others will not like you as much. However, this couldn’t be further from the truth.
And if they do, you really don’t want them in your life anyway. Creating boundaries gives you the opportunity to say YES to things you actually enjoy doing and spend more time with the people you love.
So it’s time to start creating boundaries for yourself and learn how to say no. This doesn’t mean you are a bad person, it just means you have limits and you’re not a robot!
Saying no can be really difficult especially when we are used to saying yes, but it’s a necessary habit for women who want to be more resilient.
10. Have Confident Body Language
Do you know the whole standing in front of the mirror in a power pose thing? Yeah, there are plenty of studies that show this actually works.
Start working on your body image and get yourself into a more powerful position. Stop picking your body apart. Your body is amazing if you think about it. Without it, you wouldn’t be here! Practicing positive self-talk and power poses can be really powerful when you’re trying to boost your self-esteem and confidence.
A women’s self-confidence can soar when they feel confident in their body.
There are lots of other things you can do as well like smiling, making eye contact, and keeping your head up.
Even something as simple as sitting up straight will make you feel more confident and show others that you are ready to crush whatever task comes your way.
11. Dress for Success
I love wearing sweatpants but if I wear pajamas or sweatpants for days, I start to feel quite lazy.
If you’re not feeling your best, it’s going to show in your attitude and work performance. I hate to admit it, but I always feel better and more confident if I get ready for the day. It’s a mindset shift and it signals to my brain that it’s time to crush the day.
Start dressing for success by wearing clothes that make you feel powerful and confident. This could be a power suit, a dress, or something that makes you feel put together. All that matters is that you feel good!
When you look good, you’ll have good feelings about your day!
12. Practice Self Care and Self Love
One of the best things you can do for yourself is to incorporate self care into your routine. This means taking time for yourself to relax and de-stress.
It could be something as simple as reading a book, taking a bath, going for a walk, or meditating. Self care is essential for women who want to be more resilient.
Another important thing is self love. This means accepting and loving yourself just the way you are.
It’s not always easy, but it’s definitely worth it!
13. Adopt a Growth Mindset
We all know women who are always trying to better themselves- these women have a growth mindset. This term was originally coined by Carol Dweck.
Confident women aren’t afraid of failure and they know that it’s okay to make mistakes. They believe that they can learn anything they put their minds to. They believe if you put in the reps, you will come out on top and be able to accomplish all your hopes and dreams.
These women are constantly learning and growing, which helps them become more resilient. If you want to be more like this, start adopting a growth mindset.
This means seeing challenges as opportunities for growth and learning. It also means having a can-do attitude and being open to new ideas.
If every woman incorporated just one of these habits, we could begin to close the confidence gap. The more we work on our low self-confidence, the more we will believe that we can do anything we put our minds to.
Because we can!
It is important for women who want to be more confident and resilient to practice self-care by taking time for themselves and their well-being. If we don’t feel good, we aren’t going to be able to perform at our maximum abilities. So take care of yourself first, then help others where you can.
And remember, gaining confidence takes a lot of time so be patient! All great things take time after all! This is all about the journey, not the destination because we all can always work on our confidence.
What are some other habits women can adopt to close the confidence gap? Let me know the different ways you work on your confidence! Let me know in the comments!
Until next time,
Related Posts on ways to become a confident women
- 11 Tips on How to Carry Yourself with Confidence
- Leveling up in Life doesn’t have to be hard!
- How to Stop People Pleasing and Live Life on Your Own Terms